Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Torn

FYI- This post is probably going sound like it is coming more from Debbie Downer rather then Positive Polly :( I apologize in advance, but I have to get this out of my head and my heart!

What do you do when those who you thought would be your biggest supporters are the ones who turn their backs on you? They begin to distance themselves from you, making it obvious they don't agree with your choice to grow your family through the miracle of adoption. The looks, the attitudes, the comments under their breath and the disregard for your feelings during all of it. Acting as though you are doing something wrong or crazy? How do you wrap your head around it all? The disappointed that you feel for people that you thought would be a source of encouragement through this journey!

Over the last few months this has been a constant in my life. People who I considered to be like family have been treating me differently, distancing themselves from myself and my son. Treating me as though there is something wrong with my decision to adopt. I would be lying if I said this has not caused me plenty of hurt. To think that anyone could ever look at adoption in a negative way crushes my heart.

Our Father calls us to care for the orphans!!! No, not every single person is called to adopt but every single person IS called to do something!!! How can people choose to look the other way!! Choosing to refuse to step out of their comfortable box and make themselves vulnerable to our Father and where he may want us? Does anyone think adoption is easy? NO, it isn't! This journey has been one of the most emotional and sometimes stressful experiences I have gone through but I wouldn't change one thing about it!! I am so thankful that God placed me on this journey!!

I am at a point where I don't know what to do except pray for guidance! I know some decisions have to be made, but I am not ready to make them. I think I am still in disbelief that those who I cared so much about would do this?

6 comments:

  1. Hi, my name is Tara. i've been following your blog for a while now. My husband and I are in the process of our second adoption (using West Sands this time). I just want to let you know I will be praying for you and hope that there are those who come alongside to support and encourage. In our prayers - Tara

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  2. Sarah,
    I was there and know your pain. I will be praying for you!

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  3. Thanks ladies!! Your prayers and support mean a lot!!

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  4. Sarah,
    Just want to give you some encouragement. I went through the same thing with some friends. It does hurt at first, but God will bring those people into your life that will be there for you. Remember that sometimes doing the right thing will not be the most popular (to the world). I will be praying for you.

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  5. Thank you so much Kelli!! I love knowing I have such awesome prayer warriors like you, praying for me during this adoption process!! God Bless you!!

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  6. I don't know you but I just found your blog. I had a similar experience with a family member. It is hard, you are right! But the reward for your suffering will come. God will bless you through your adoption even before you bring your child home! God doesn't call us to an easy, comfortable life... but it's a joyful life all the same! I'll be praying for peace and wisdom for you as you work toward bringing that little one home!

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