Wednesday, February 22, 2012 No comments

Kelly over at Kelly's Korner Blog worded it perfectly when talking about Lent. So perfect that I borrowed part of her post :)

I'm Southern Baptist. We don't really do Lent.

In fact I only loosely get the idea of what lent is all about. (So all of you reading this who are Catholic or Methodist - I'm warning you - I'm probably not getting it right).

I've never done Lent but I've been thinking about it for the last couple of weeks and I like the idea of it.  I don't feel like I need to give up a luxury as penitence. Jesus already paid the price for my sins and His grace has covered me.  BUT I thought it would neat to maybe give up something that would enable me to put more focus on God for the 40 days leading up to Easter.

So with that being said, what am I going to do without for 40 days?? Well at first I thought Facebook, simply because I know I have a bad habit of grabbing my IPhone and checking status updates when I could be putting my time toward something far more important. Then I thought I really want to be able to keep everyone updated on my adoption process, and I do that through Facebook for those I know IRL. Then I thought about blogging, but honestly I don't blog enough to justify giving that up. I'm already changing my eating to a more natural way which includes giving up processed food, sugar and caffeine, so I couldn't really say I was going to give up cokes, Ha! Then it hit me! What do I find myself doing at night when I could be spending extra time with my King?

Watching TV! Not that I am a TV junkie, because trust me I am far from it :) but I do have a few shows that I enjoy watching every week, like Parenthood, Grey's Anatomy and Law and Order SVU. I also enjoy watching 7th Heaven on DVD with Noah that we get through Netflix, and while it is a good wholesome show that teaches a great lesson pretty much in every episode, I could be spending that time reading the Word and letting my Father teach me lessons himself rather then through a show. So TV it is. I will admit I will be setting my DVR to record my shows. Judge if you must, Ha

I have to admit I am kinda looking forward to the next 40 days :) The time I spent in Ethiopia was spent without TV and easy internet access, and I loved it! It is amazing how more clearly we can hear the Lord when we don't have so many things cluttering our heads or distracting us!

So is anyone else giving up something for Lent??

Sick & Tired

Monday, February 20, 2012 2 comments
There was really no other title that speaks more clearly of how I have felt the last few weeks. I am literally sick and tired of being sick and tired! Ever since coming home from Ethiopia I have been sick, dealing with stomach issues, fatigue, headaches, head congestion to the point I feel like I am in a big fog and two weeks ago I was diagnosed with Pneumonia. I thought for sure once I started the antibiotic for the Pneumonia I would feel better, no such luck :( A week after being on medicine I still couldn't kick my cough and shortness of breath, to the point that I had to take a real deep breath in after every couple of tiny breaths. I ended up back in the ER where the doctor thought I might have a blood clot in my lung! To say I was scared is an understatement!! I was hysterical!! Being a nurse I know the severity of that and all I could keep thinking was "I was going to die" I am thankful my mom was with me and God love her she was scared too but wasn't showing it. She kept telling me I was going to be fine and not to worry. My mom, the pillar of strength!!

It took two nurses to get an IV in me and then I was quickly taken to get a CT scan done of my head and chest. I remember lying there crying, just praying that the Lord would restore my health. I had texted a couple of my good friends aka prayer warriors :) these ladies mean so much to me and not only am I thankful for their friendships but for their willingness to take my needs to the Father as well. I knew that no matter what happened God was in ultimate control and I had to be okay with whatever his plan was. Which let's face it, is not always easy!  

The waiting seemed forever. I sat there thinking about what the doctor was going to say, and was scared to move, let alone cough, scared if I did have a clot, my moving/coughing would cause it to travel somewhere even worse. I have never been so scared in my entire life. Finally the doctor came in and no lie his first question was "So how are you feeling" Seriously buddy?!?! How do you think I am feeling?? He then told me I did NOT have any clots, but that my Pneumonia was STILL hanging around and he was going to prescribe me a stronger antibiotic and an inhaler. I just sat there crying and thanking God for watching over me and answering my prayers!!

I took the next couple of days and rested. I went to Whole Foods and picked up a good strong Multi Vitamin as well as a Probiotic to start taking. I am DETERMINED to get myself healthy!! I also plan on changing my diet for a while to a more natural, whole food eating, and am going to pick up a parasite cleanser from Whole Foods as well just in case I picked something up while in Ethiopia.

I have never been one to put myself first, and I have never taken real good care of myself. I blame it on never really having the extra time, but something the Lord has taught me over the last few weeks of sickness is that I can't be 100% when it comes to being a Mommy if I am not taking care of myself!!

Isaiah 58:11 "The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail."

If you think about it I would be humbled if you would keep me in your prayers for my health over the next couple of weeks as I continue to try new things to get myself feeling better. I know the stress of not having my baby home is not helping and I continue to remind myself that God's timing is perfect and Isaiah will come home at the perfect time. Thank you friends for praying for me! You have no idea how much they mean to me!

6 weeks......

Monday, February 13, 2012 1 comment
My Sweet Isaiah,

It has been six weeks since Mommy held you in my arms. I miss you so much it hurts. I never realized how hard it was going to be to just sit and wait for the phone to ring to tell me I can come back to get you and bring you home forever! While I feel so blessed to have had that special time with you during my first trip to Ethiopia, you have a Big Brother at home who just can not wait to meet you, to hold you and play with you. Noah loves to talk about you and tell me all about the things he is going to teach you.

Thanks to sweet friends Mommy has gotten some really cute updated pictures of you since I left and even a little video!! You are getting so big and it makes me so sad to think of what milestones I am missing. I wonder if you are crawling? When we were together you were rolling from your back to your side and you were really good at holding yourself up with your hands and looking around. I know it sounds silly, but Mommy hopes you are not crawling yet. I would love to be able to see you do that for the first time. You were drooling a lot when we were together, which makes me wonder if you have any teeth? Your gums looked like they were getting ready, so it won't surprise me if the next time I see you your smile includes a tooth or two :) Your hair is getting longer and your curls are popping up everywhere!

I wake up every morning and see your picture sitting on my nightstand. I pray daily that the Lord continues to watch over you and keep you safe and that things will move quickly and you will be back in Mommy's arms very soon!! Noah really wants you home for his birthday, so that is what he prays for! If I could travel back tonight and stay with you until we pass embassy I would do it in a heart beat! Leaving you was one of the hardest things I have ever done. You were attaching to me so well when we were together and I pray that you remember me when you see me again.

Isaiah, Mommy loves you so much and I can not wait to have you home. Sleeping in your crib next to your big brother, watching your sweet personality grow as well as your relationship with Noah. I know you both are going to be the best of friends. God truly hand picked you to join our family.

4 Weeks & Counting........

Thursday, February 2, 2012 1 comment
It has been 4 weeks since I heard those words "He is yours" 4 weeks since I last held my precious little boy and I can tell you one thing is for sure it feels like it has been 4 months since I was in Ethiopia. I miss Isaiah so much. I look at pictures friends have sent me and I just want to cry at how much he has changed. His little face looks so grown up and it makes me sad to thing of the milestones I am missing. His hair is getting longer and those curls of his are coming in more. I just love his curls!! I continue to pray he is back in my arms soon!!

Before I traveled for my first trip I would have friends who told me they missed Ethiopia. I could never understand what there was to miss once their children were home? That is until now. There is so much I miss about my son's birth country. I can't explain it, but while I was there I just felt different. Life was different for me for those 7 days, but different in a good way. I didn't have the distractions that we have in America, such as TV, laptops, cell phones, long work hours, running here and there, and well you get the point, things we think we need allow to take up our time. Instead I spent my time relaxing at the Father's feet, reflecting on my journey over the last year and praising God for everything he has done through my adoption. I prayed that God would continue to break my heart for what breaks his. I don't want my journey to stop once Isaiah is home. I have been forever changed by Ethiopia and the people there.

So........what have Noah and I been up to these last 4 weeks?
Noah lost his first top tooth right before I left for ET and the second one was VERY close to coming out! I was so worried he was going to loose the second one while I was gone. I told my mom to not let him eat any apples, Ha! Luckily the tooth stayed in and the weekend I came home he lost it! Of course the tooth fairy was fighting such terrible jet lag that she fell asleep before remembering to make the switch, but I told Noah she must have been real tired from flying 24 hours visiting other children, and she promptly made a visit the next night, Ha! I love his little toothless smile :) My sweet boy!!

I started my new job 2 days after coming home. Thankfully the first week was spent in a classroom because I had horrible jet lag. The first two weeks I was home I slept 12-14 hours every night!! There were nights I would sit on the couch and try to stay awake, only to literally pass out sitting up!! Thankfully Noah was up for getting some extra sleep those two weeks and joined me in my post jet lag sleep phase. I honestly think he was catching up on some sleep as well. My mom told me he did not handle me being gone very well and that he didn't sleep very well. Poor buddy :( So we both enjoyed catching up on our sleep!

My new job is going well. I am still getting used to the working environment. To say I feel like I am in a mini mission field is a understatement :) I am surrounded by a lot of people who do not know the Lord. I had been praying that the Lord would give me a way to spread the Gospel to those around me and let me just say I LOVE when the Lord answers those prayers!! Recently a lot of people I work with have found out that I am adopting and have been asking me about it. So with excitement I have been telling them about my adoption journey which can not be told without sharing all about how the Lord called me to adopt and how we are all adopted into God's family as his children!! I pray I continue to be a light for the Lord in my work place.

I have my "to do list" of things I want to get done before Isaiah comes home. My mom went with Noah and I a couple of weeks ago to register at Babies R Us for all the things I will need once Isaiah gets home. My mom and sister originally wanted to throw me a baby shower but after thinking about it we all three decided that they will host a "sip n see" about a month after Isaiah is home. That way all those who have prayed for him over the last year and a half will have a opportunity to come and see him :)

Speaking of my sweet baby! Take a look at one of the most recent pictures I have of him from my friend Julie. Could you not just eat him up!! He is just so stinkin cute!! I know I am a little partial :) I can't get over his eyes! Noah talks about his little brother a lot!! He is constantly telling me he really hopes Isaiah is home for his birthday and it is something he prays for every night. When ever we go into my obsession Target Noah always wants to go into the toy department so he can pick out which toys he wants to get for Isaiah. That little guy has no idea how much love his big brother has waiting on him! I can not wait to see my boys together and learning from each other.
A few prayer request for my faithful prayer warriors (I just love ya'll)
  • Please continue to pray for my sweet Isaiah, that the Lord continues to prepare his little heart for his family waiting for him to come home
  • That the Lord would allow him to be home before his big brother's birthday which is March 17th
  • I am currently in need of a travel buddy. I know if I have to I can make the trip alone, but let's face it traveling with a infant for over 24 hours with luggage would be a lot easier with an extra set of hands :)
  • Pray that I would be able to take at least 6 weeks off once Isaiah is home. One of the reasons I switched jobs was because the hospital offers wonderful benefits including great health insurance and paid maternity leave.
  • Please pray for Isaiah's birth mom, I will always be so thankful that she chose life for his child.