Looking Back

One of the things I love most about this blog is I am able to look back and see how God orchestrated every detail of my adoption and bringing Isaiah home!! The amazing things He did to allow me the blessing of being his momma leave me speechless at times, and if you know me you know that doesn't happen often, Ha!! I love blogging. I love the wonderful friends I have made over the last few years, I love the community and the fact that the Lord has used this little ole blog of mine to minister to other single mommas who are either in process or are praying about starting the process. Only God!! This year I have gone back and forth (literally back and forth a hundred times, lol) about closing this blog and starting fresh. I went through such a hard time after bringing Isaiah home and yes you read that right. Adopting a baby is hard, no matter how little they are, these sweet babies still deal with loss and there are still issues you will face once they come home. End soap box :-) Anyway, I struggled with trying to decide if I wanted a new blog for the new journey God has brought my boys and I to, but then I was reminded at how much I enjoy looking back and being reminded of God's Faithfulness and how every step of Isaiah's adoption journey was just a stepping stool to where my boys and I are now. If you follow me on Instagram you may have gathered that I have been going through a pretty hard time the last few weeks. Things have actually been pretty rough the last few months but have gotten increasingly worse over the last few weeks. The amazing thing about this rough season is again God is faithful!! Sweet friends I wish I could share with you the amazing things that have happen just in the last few days and I promise if I am able soon, I will. It is my life's prayer that every single thing in my life will always point to Jesus, that others would always see more of Him and so little of me. So last night I had the revelation that I don't need a "new" blog. Yes I need a blog makeover, Ha!! That though will just have to wait until the new Dave Ramsey budget says I have the money for that, lol but a new blog I don't need. I need to continue to add the pieces the Lord provides to the amazing story He is continuing to write for my boys and I and wait on Him to reveal the next chapter. I have so much more to write, to share but for now friends I need to stop and get some school work done. Would you please pray for me. This season of life has definitely been hard but what an unbelievable relief it is to know that I don't have to handle any of it alone. I can bring it to my Father's feet and rest in Him, knowing He is working out all the details. For He is my daily bread and meets my every need.

Thankful Thursday

Ya'll I just have to post and give some major shout and praise to our amazing Heavenly Father and all that He is doing in my sweet friend's life and her husband's life. I met Kendra through the blog world :-) She lives in the Midwest and I am in the South, but honestly distance has not kept us from becoming really good friends and as I call her she is my sister from another mister, Ha!!! Seriously though, I just love her to pieces and am so thankful the Lord crossed our paths. I have enjoyed watching the Lord work in her life over the last 6 months and it would do your heart well to check out her blog here and read for yourself how God has been blessing she and her hubby's socks off :-) I have had the honor of praying for her and watching God answer those prayers in BIG ways!!! Now I can't wait to see what He does next for these two amazing people!! Don't ya just love my little prayer card I made for myself for praying for them? I totally hijacked this picture from Facebook a few weeks ago and enhanced it some, lol

 

 

While I'm praising the Lord, let me just shout PRAISE HIM, PRAISE HIM for bringing me through yet another quarter of school!! 2 quarters down, only 4 more to go!!! The best part is I am not officially done with all things that start with the word Anatomy, lol Seriously 6 months of Anatomy I and II was enough to make me pull my hair out. When I went to Haiti in May I knew I would be adding a lot of pressure to myself when I came home because I would come home right in time for finals, but I knew God was calling me to go, so there was no way I was going to not go. I went in my last Anatomy final with a big failing grade but because I serve an amazing God that is way bigger than any class or test I ended up passing my final with a 90% and passed all my classes!!! Now to breath for 10 days or so before starting back at it again. At least I won't have to look at anymore binders full of Anatomy pictures, lol

 This week Noah is participating in two VBS's, one in the morning and one in the evening. It has been so much fun watching him learn about Jesus and I have loved the conversations we have been having on the drives home about what he is learning. Noah LOVES putting Isaiah to bed at night. He actually thinks it is his job, lol so I just go with it. The first night I picked him up from VBS he asked me if Isaiah was still awake at home and I told him no, that I had put him to bed before I came to get him. He looked at me so serious and said "but mom, he needs me to put him to bed and tuck him in" Seriously, melt this momma's heart. When we got home that night at 9:30 I told Noah to quietly go in his room and get ready for bed (the boys share a room now, per Noah's request, lol) I heard Noah talking and I walked in to see this. He was laying in the rocking chair next to Isaiah's crib, holding his hand and was telling him all about his night at VBS and asking about his night. Apparently Isaiah was still awake when we got home :-) I tell ya, these two just constantly pull at my heart with the bond they share. Only God!!

 

Lastly, I am SO THANKFUL for this little reminder I saw on Instagram today. My mind is sometimes a very scary place, lol with all my thoughts, fears, hopes, dreams and throw in some anxiety and there are days where it is a perfect recipe for disaster, Ha!! Yes, far from what some believe this girl is a hot mess on the inside and I am just so thankful for my Jesus who loves me anyway and is a constant in my life and is always reminding me in His ways that everything WILL be okay, to just continue trusting in Him and His timing. Clinging to Him right now during a season that has brought on A LOT of anxiety in me that I am fighting daily to push away and replace with truth. Would love it if ya'll would pray for me.  

 

 

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

1 Peter 5:7

Someone Had A Birthday!!!

My sweet Isaiah turned 2 this past Monday!! I'm still trying to figure out where that year went :-) I'm having his party in a couple of weeks so for his actual birthday we went to his all time favorite place to eat, CooCoo aka Chick-Fil-A and celebrated there with my mom, sister, niece, nephews and my sweet friend and her kiddos. A friend of mine made his cake. She is great at taking my crazy ideas and turning them into an awesome cake!! I especially love how she put an I and Z block on the bottom because that is what I call him sometimes, my little IZ :-) His face was priceless when he saw his cake. To say he is a fan of Elmo is the understatement of the year, lol He is obsessed!!! Everything is ELMO!!! Rumor has it a real live Elmo will be making a guest appearance at his party :-) I told my friends who are coming either their kids will have a blast or need therapy, depending on their love for characters in costume, Ha!!!

 

 

 

Isaiah,

 

I can't believe you are 2 already!! It was just 14 months ago we were stepping off the plane after our long journey home. I stay amazed to see what God has done this last year, and am so thankful He chose me to be your mommy. You bring me more joy than I ever thought possible and I honestly have a hard time remembering life without you in it. It feels like you have always been here. I absolutely LOVE watching you and Noah together. For 18 months as I waited to bring you home I prayed that the two of you would have a strong relationship. God answered those prayers BIG time. The two of you are almost inseparable. When you wake up in the morning you stand in your crib and holler for "momma" and "bubba" You are definitely Noah's shadow and you look at him as your keeper. Noah is so sweet with you, always wanting to teach you things and you just look at him as though you are hanging on to every word. You want to do EVERYTHING he does!! You currently love everything baseball, because Noah is playing baseball. The two of you are just so sweet and it makes my heart swell to see the bond you two share. I am blessed beyond words by you two.

 

Some fun fact about you right now:

 

About 6 weeks ago you had tubes put in your ears. Since coming home you had struggled with constant ear infections and fluid in your ears. Not only were you on antibiotics too many times for my liking (the nurse coming out in me, lol) but the constant fluid was causing you a lot of balance problems, as well as stunting your speech. Your vocabulary consisted of about 3 words and when you did try to speak you sounded like you were under water. They tested your hearing before the surgery and they actually had to put the volume as high as it would go for you to even hear it. It made me that much more anxious to see how you would be after the tubes were put in. The surgery itself lasted all of about 12 minutes!! You did great and the tubes quickly got rid of all that nasty fluid :-) the only bad part was watching you come out of the anesthesia!! You were so pitiful and were not yourself AT ALL!!!! You spent the next 2 hours screaming uncontrollably. We came home and you took about a 3 hour nap, and woke up your happy, smiling self :-) The best part is now 6 weeks later you are talking up a storm!!!! You are still working on putting words with your thoughts. You get really excited sometimes and start trying to tell me something and than end up doing hand gestures to go along with what you are trying to tell me. It is seriously so cute :-)

 

You LOVE Elmo, ALL things Elmo :-) You have a specific Elmo you sleep with along with your taggy that I took to Ethiopia for you when I traveled to bring you home. You have to have those two things to go to sleep. Your sleeping Elmo as I call it is really cute, you push it's belly and it says "Elmo so sleepy" and now you have started saying that when I lay you down. It is so cute!! You also love playing with cars, ball, and you LOVE to be read to. You could sit for hours and read book after book. You enjoy being outside. For your birthday you got a water table and you absolutely love it. I'm anxious to take you swimming this summer. You love the water :-)

 

You go for your 2yr check up in a couple of weeks. At your 18 month check up where you were actually 20 months old, lol

•  you weighed 22 pound 13 ounces and were 31 1/2 inches long. You are still playing catch up but you are healthy and that is all I am worried about.
• You wear a size 6 shoe and your clothes range from a size 2T-3T depending on the brand.
• You are a very good eater when it comes to fruits and veggies but you are not a fan of most meat and dairy. You love yogurt but hate cheese, cottage cheese and it is sometimes a struggle to get you to drink milk. When it comes to meat that is at times a bigger struggle. Needless to say you get your protein from other sources :-) You are my little plant based eater, lol
• You love having your picture taken, especially when Mommy will turn the camera part on my phone around and you can see yourself as we take pictures. You think that is so funny :-) Your smile lights up any room!!
• You have recently started acting interested in the big potty!! This brings your momma much excitement, lol but I am not holding my breath. You have sat on the potty a few times but I am not pushing you. You are very smart and recognize when you need your diaper changed, so here is hoping that leads to some summer time potty training :-)
• Music is one of your favorite things. Your favorite song of all time is "Me Without You" by Toby Mac!! No matter what you are doing, if that song comes on you stop and start dancing! A few months ago the group For King and Country came to our church to perform and you had such a fun time. You stood out in the middle of the aisle with your hands in the air, dancing along to the music. I love seeing you worship in your own little way!!

Isaiah you are such a joy! You have come so far since coming home last year and I will never stop praising the Lord for your life and what He has done!! Your life is a story of Redemption, God's Love and Grace, and Restoration. I look forward to watching how God uses you and your brother for His Kingdom.

 

 "But now, this is what the Lord says
    he who created you, Jacob,
    he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
    I have summoned you by name; you are mine"

Isaiah 43:1

 

I love you to the moon and back my sweet IZ!! Happy Birthday!!

Love, Mommy

Confirmation In Haiti

I have been home three days and honestly have no idea how long it will take me to process everything the Lord did during my time in Jacmel, Haiti the 11 days I was there. I could have NEVER dreamed or imagined what the Almighty had up His sleeve for my time there. One thing He made clear was His desire for me to use my spiritual gift of nursing for medical missions. While I don't know just yet what that is going to look like, I do know that is why He called me back to school when He did. I have decided to spend the next 12 months finishing school and staying in constant prayer that He would continue to make His path for my life known and that I would be obedient.

 

Haiti is such an amazing beautiful place but so dark at the same time. The enemy is alive at every corner, prowling over the poor and desperate. Voodoo is overwhelming there and the amount of people who think that is the answer is overwhelmingly sad and real. There were times that I just wanted to scream at them to turn from the darkness and turn to JESUS, their Savior and light!!! If only it were that easy. Sadly there were many who heard the Gospel and yet still turned from it. I can only hope that the many seeds that were planted will grow over the coming weeks and months and that those who turned will soon find the Light.

 

 

Our six days of medical clinics went amazing. The sick were healed in the name of Jesus, the Gospel was preached and over 30 people gave their lives to Christ!!! It was incredible. In every child's face I saw HOPE, with every smile I saw JESUS and with every "thank you" spoken in my broken French with a Kentucky twang I saw relationships being built with the Haitian people and the local churches and pastors who we were partnering with. I'm thankful that even though we are gone, that the wonderful pastors in Jacmel will follow up with those we helped and Lord willing more lives will be won for Christ!!

 

There is SO MUCH MORE I can/want/need to say about my trip, and who knows maybe I will, or maybe the experiences will stay forever etched in my heart, never to leave, always reminding me to go to all nations and preach the Gospel, even if for one soul, one is still a soul for Christ. I hope as the days continue I am able to come back to my little space here and write more. For now I will let the pictures tell a little part of the story.

"I raise my eyes toward the mountains.  Where will my help come from?  My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2